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Trial Separation

So a couple I know who have been together for years finally got a break from each other via a temporary separation — perhaps not of their own accord but more so by circumstances but still, this trial separation should do them some good.

They have been unhappy for awhile anyway.  As in any relationship, there are good days and there are bad days.  However, the bad days kept overriding the good days so much so that the good days fall like rain nowadays — EXACTLY!  There’s no rain this season… so there.

So now, they are not living together anymore — at least for awhile.  How long this will last, no one knows.  But here’s hoping that both will take this opportunity to assess where they stand in the relationship; what they want out of it; what they are willing to give and give-up for it.

Let’s also hope that they will take this time to truly know themselves — how much of themselves have been molded by the relationship and how much of themselves grew-up on their own — without any influence from the relationship or from their partners.

It’s so easy for us to lose ourselves when we are in a relationship.  After all, if the person is making us happy why shouldn’t we break a few personal rules in order to allow the relationship to run as smoothly as possible, right?

True, we should learn to compromise because we are both individuals wanting to be together so that union is bound to be explosive.  But there is a limit to compromises, especially when you start to lose yourself in the process.

I have been guilty of this in ALL of my relationships that’s why after my last break-up, I took a long self-imposed hiatus from relationships [10 years this year to be exact].  I tried to be on my own, struggling through life without support from a partner — it was one hell of a struggle, mind you.

But in the end, I learned to value myself more.  I learned not to be afraid to be alone anymore.  I must admit though that there were hundreds of times when I wanted to throw in the towel because I’d get pretty lonely sometimes.

Now that I know I am ready again for a relationship, I know that whoever he will be is gonna be one lucky guy — I’ve gotten rid of my excess baggage, hehehe. 😀

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