Excerpts from As I Wreck This Chair Column…
I read this article in the Philippine Star way back in December last year and it was so funny and witty I just had to share it. 🙂
The author, William M. Esposo, likewise quoted the following from Loi Reyes Landicho, a blogger also known as The Professional Heckler
I am quoting verbatim:
“First, some bad news. Mayon Volcano has erupted. The xplosion has endangered the lives of Albay residents…prompting President Arroyo to declare martial law in the province.
It’s the holiday season. It’s Christmas! The signs are all over: people flocking to Divisoria; Communist rebels declaring a truce with the government, and Satur Ocampo shaking hands with Bongbong Marcos!
A Yuletide trivia about the Defensor-Santiagos. Since 1992, Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago and her husband have refused to display Christmas trees in their house. Asked why, the couple replied, “Ganun katindi ang galit namin sa mga puno.”
Instead of designating someone to buy stuff for him, Sen. Manny Villar himself did the shopping this year. The most expensive item he bought was Loren Legarda.
Atty. Gilbert Teodoro had a difficult time shopping. So he just let Ronaldo Puno do the work for him.
Something bad happened to the Nativity Scene created by Sen. Panfilo Lacson. The three kings who were traveling at night were mistaken for robbers and were ‘neutralized.’ Lacson accused Erap of masterminding it.
The Liberal Party’s re-enactment of the Nativity Scene was one of the most controversial. Serge Osmeña backed out from playing Jesus when he learned that Ralph and Vilma would play Joseph and Mary.
In Pampanga, the re-enactment of the Nativity Scene at the capitol was ordered stopped by Governer Ed Panlilio. The priest-on-leave canceled the event when Mr. and Mrs. Bong and Lilia Pineda insisted on playing the role of infant Jesus’ “godparents.”
In fairness to Lakas-Kampi-CMD, they did try to re-enact the Nativity Scene. They just couldn’t really complete the cast.
The Senate is holding a lavish Christmas celebration. Everyone is expected to attend…except for Chiz Escudero. The guy hates parties.
Guess who’ll be the busiest senator this Christmas? Who else but Loren Legarda. She’ll be hopping from party to party.
The Senate plans to recreate the Nativity Scene. Noynoy Aquino has been tapped to play the role of the Virgin.
Sen. Manny Villar won’t play any part in the Nativity Scene but he volunteered to donate the house, the lot, and the manger.
For some reason, Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile has rejected suggestions to let Senators Jamby Madrigal, Bong Revilla, and Lito Lapid to play the three wise men.
Sen. Mar Roxas has repeatedly expressed interest to play the role of Joseph. But getting no support from his colleagues, he withdrew.”
Whew! There’s more where that came from. I just didn’t realize it was so long! Will post continuation next time… 😀